Monthly Archives: August 2013

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I want something beautiful

The act of making porn requires a unique sort of commitment not a lot of average Joes, or Jills, can understand. Because the internet is anonymous, the brand of criticism you receive is, singularly spectacular. For whatever reason, the porn consuming masses are the single most hypocritical lot around. Take away their porn, and they’d respond with a baseball bat of justice, with words like freedom of speech and anti-censorship carved into it’s shaft – the last words you’d read before your brain got caved in. And yet, as I’ve said many times, they loathe the idea of supporting it, or the stars or the studios. It’s a weird relationship I’ve yet to understand. But, at the end of the day, we all just want what we want. People who make porn, and star in it, want that too. Their involvement is a clue to their personalities as well – being naked and having sex for people’s enjoyment takes passion. Not sexual passion. But, passion for life, and the desire for something beautiful.

The porn itself isn’t what I define as “beautiful”, but the act of porn is tied to freedom of expression, artistic purity, naked truth (literal and figurative). The girls I’ve worked with (a few exceptions) all did their first scene, whether with me or someone else, because they wanted to know what it would be like. The intensely intimate act with a room full of people watching. Knowing that, while she’s home doing dishes, or on the bus, anyone around her could be watching her fuck, right now. It’s both scary and exciting. That feeling is beautiful. To know you’re not holding anything back – giving it all in spite the cowardly comments and accusations from anonymous internet tough-guys. It’s amazing.

If you’ve read my bio or more than 3 of these blog posts, you’ll know that I’m not in porn because I’m a dirty fuck, or because I make money at it or I’m vain. The shoots are fun, and the girls are beautiful so I enjoy the sex, of course. But, it’s not all about that. It’s about creating something that’s mine, and that others can enjoy it. I watch porn like anyone else, and it’s great. I love being able to give something back. That’s the real fun – seeing it done, and knowing someone is enjoying it. And, ultimately, the knowledge that when my time is almost done on this earth, I won’t look back and only have a series of bills paid on time to show for my life. I’ll have given something back. Beautiful.

Speaking of beautiful …well, Vyxen Steel is pretty beautiful. Do that Like thing for those amazing natural tits, and enjoy.

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When shit happens, and you can’t do shit – it’s bullshit

First, I do freelance creative work, and I did 2 solid months worth of work for one new client, valued at around $8,000. The client said, “we wrote the cheque, and it’s on the way”. That was a month ago. Now, they don’t answer my emails anymore.

What I can do about it?: fuck-all.

I put up my website, and it was hacked by socially-maladjusted degenerates. I ask them to be decent and remove the link. They tell me to fuck off.

What I can do about it?: fuck-all.

Right after the hack gets fixed, ALL my sites go down due to the most massive and epic server failure in the history of my webhost company. It takes them almost 24 hours to get things sorted out.

What I can do about it?: fuck-all.

Was I pissed? Fuckin’ right. Did I feel ass-raped? Yup. Did feeling that way help me? Not one fuckin’ bit. I was totally charming for about 72 hours, miserable and no fun to talk to. My friends try to help me see the upsides, but I was too pissed. The upside, I couldn’t see at the time, is that I have friends willing to spend their personal time talking to a miserable version of me, telling me there must be an upside. That is the upside, as it turns out.

Thanks George, and Anthony.

Shit happens, and you can’t do shit. But, that’s not true, actually. You can. You can say, “Fuck it.” Do what you can, and don’t sweat the rest. I forgot that.

Speaking of things I CAN do, I can show you teenage naked girls getting fucked. Here’s some Teen Barbie Doll and Krista. Hit those likes, and get on with your day.

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The douchebags that give the rest of us a bad name

I’ve encountered my share of douche-bags in this business. There are bags of douche in every walk of life and work, of course. However, there’s something about douche-bags in the adult business that stand out. That’s likely because of the reputation the biz has, and what people expect of us emboldens certain people to act especially douche-baggy. I was tempted to write my list of douchery by names, but then realized …what’s the point? They didn’t achieve douche-dom by caring that people thought they were douche-bags. I will however recount this quick little story.

I have a graphic design website I use for my “other life”. I launch my site this morning, and there’s a “webcam girls” link on the header. Some fuckin’ reject hacked my site. I call my webhost and the security guys do their thing. In the meantime I followed the link to see if there was someone I could contact. The site had a number. I called…

Asshole in Customer Service:    Customer Service.

Me:    Yeah, I have a malicious weblink on my site that points to your webcam site. I’m just calling to ask what’s up with that?

Asshole in Customer Service:    Yeah, I’m obviously not going to help you with that.

Me:    Well, it’s pointing to your site, so what do you mean you’re not going to help me? You guys put it there.

Asshole in Customer Service:    Call you webhost and get them to remove it.

Me:    I did call them – that’s not the point. The point is <asshole cuts me off>

Asshole in Customer Service:    Listen buddy, I’m in customer service, not advertising, so call your webhost and get them to deal with it.

Me:    Fine, put me through to your advertising guys since they did it.

Asshole in Customer Service:    No.

Me:    What do you mean, no?

Asshole in Customer Service:    No, I’m not going to put you through to the guys that did it. Call your webhost.

Me:    Wow, okay …that’s fucked up. Thanks, I guess.

Asshole in Customer Service:    You’re welcome.

If you choose to be a stain on society, fine. My question to this guy would be, “How do you treat people in your life?” You kiss your kids at night? What a waste of biological material. Dude, you’re worthless. Good luck with the rest of your life being a douche.

It doesn’t matter if you work in porn, a douche-bag webcam site, or at McDonalds, we all have a responsibility to be good. To contribute to the betterment of those around us. Yes, we do. Yes. We. Do. This, “All for me and fuck you” business is for weaklings. It takes guts to care about people around you, and the ones not around you …like some random guy on the internet who’s site you hacked. You have to do the right thing once in a while, even when it means you don’t get to take something that isn’t yours. Sacrifice and compassion …they take guts. Douche-bags can’t do it.

Speaking of the right thing, I have to share some Hazel Star …’cause it’s the only right thing to do. Do that Like thing, and enjoy.